how to train a buffalo for dummies

A growing number of Campdraft and cow horse trainers have enlisted the help of the docile yet cunning water buffalo as part of their program. Don’t be fooled by their calm nature these great lumps of wanna be hippos can be dead set assholes if not trained properly from the start. I’ve created a list of do’s and don’ts on how to train your water buffalo at home that I wish someone had told me before I tried to figure it out on my own… remember the 6 p’s, proper preparation prevents piss poor performance.

If you train a buffalo to run you into shit they will, every time

If you’re a tin arse like I am you’ve probably got yourself a couple buffalo, gave them funny names (Bill and Norm in my case) and chucked them in a paddock instead of buying an arena first. All well and good until they cut you off on any tree or shelter they can lay their eyes on. Moral of the story, if you haven’t got an arena or a heap of cattle panels to set up as an arena you should probably send Bill and Norm back where they came from because they are going to do nothing but piss you off.

Show no fear… and get yourself a jigger

The stupid hippos, I mean buffalo can tell when your on a young horse that’s a bit nervous and they will stand there and look at you like you aint shit. To counteract this problem I have enlisted the help of my good friend Springer Magrath, available at any good farm supplies. The bright yellow colouring of the jigger in your hands usually sends them running once they know what it is, I would strongly advise you get one or a stock whip works fine if you’re any good at using it.

Get someone to help you, or get a round yard 

If your buffalo are anything like Bill and Norm then they’re lazy bastards to say the least and will fold on you at the first chance they get. In my experience the 2 best ways to stop this from happening is chase them around a round yard or have someone help you by standing in the centre of the arena thereby giving you something to chase the buffalo around.

Give each buffalo a job and stick to it

We have learnt through our experimentation that buffalo are annoyingly smart and will learn bad habits extremely quickly. Keeping each buffalo doing their own job minimises this effect substantially as opposed to doing 5 different movements with each buffalo have them only do one. eg. Bill we work on the fence and Norm we chase in circles.

Don’t put them in a paddock with any nice trees in it 

If your not fond of buffalo rub marks up and down your mums favourite peppercorn tree then keeping them away all together is the best option. On a side note, if you have a paddock full of weeds then that’s the place to put them, I shit you not these bastards will eat anything.

Right, so just a recap go get yourself some panels and a jigger to go with your buffalo, make sure you tell them who’s boss and what their job is and keep them away from ya mums peppercorn tree. That’s it not so hard, just remember the 6 p’s.